Wednesday, January 08, 2003

I have become the Angel of Death

My mother was in hospital just before Christmas with pneumonia that wasn't responding well to antibotics. Whilst she was in hospital she had to undergo a battery of tests, getting the results back when she went to the clinic yesterday. However, the results are not good. She has an inoperable lung cancer and the doctors are hoping to start chemotherapy next week.

Meanwhile, I am about 200 miles away feeling very alone and wondering what to do. I feel angry that this is happening to my mother, and I am also angry at myself for not being there. At the same time my mother is telling me off for getting upset and when I suggested that I move back down south she told me not to be so stupid.

But what am I supposed to do?

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